Revenge of the Telemarketing Victims
Revenge of the Telemarketing Victims - How to Convince Them to Never Call You Back
By Les Golden. Cartoons by Les Golden. Additional illustrations by John Thomson and Erik Wenzel.
This hilarious tongue-in-cheek “guide” to getting rid of the annoyance posed by the telemarketing industry, written by Les Golden of Oak Park, Illinois, is guaranteed to solve that yecchy problem.
Forget the useless national do-not-call list. A writer, actor, and stand-up comic trained in improvisation at Chicago's Second City, Professor Leslie M. Golden (Ph.D, astronomy, University of California, Berkeley) has written scripts between telemarketers and homeowners to guarantee they won't call again.
Make them think they’ve reached –
- a drug dealer
- an organized crime enforcer henchman
- a psychotic being pursued by that man in the phone booth
- a guy who will buy everything and anything they have to offer
- a lonely homeowner wanting to talk endlessly with anyone
- an alien
- a guy looking for a job so he can send money back to the old country to bring his family to "Amerika"
Les Golden has devised uproarious situations to waste the #@%(&?#! telemarketer’s most precious asset – his time! This book will provide you hours of laughs as you discover ways to get rid of those pesky unwanted callers.
Yessssss, Revenge of the Telemarketing Victims!!
Read the scenes out loud at parties or at home . . . use as comedy audition dialogues for actors . . . give as the perfect fun gift . . . or use as a script when you get those calls!
Every technique laboratory-tested . . . proven effective!
Note: Publisher's Legal Disclosure[edit]
This book is outrageous, iconoclastic, offensive, and in questionable taste.
It’s infantile, sophomoric, racist, sexist, ageist, homophobic, sacrilegious, and bigoted. it is shameless, scurrilous, vile, repugnant, reprehensible, ignominious, putrid, abhorrent, loathsome, contemptible, and nauseous.
The author should have his mouth washed out with soap and his brain vacuumed clean, and he must be vanquished from modern society. he is dangerous, seditious, and a threat to freedom-loving citizens and children.
Author's Rebuttal[edit]
In other words, I’ve written the perfect book, exactly what you need to make sure those #@%(&?#!! telemarketers will take you off their lists!
Purchase Information[edit]
Available at fine book stores, amazon.com, and American distributor Digital Impressions.
Inquiries: elagencywest@aol.com
External links[edit]
- [1] Home Page
- [2] An Interview With Les Golden
- [3] N.E.A.R.
- [4] U.C. Jazz
- [5] KALX Radio 90.7 FM
- [6] Illinois Authors Listing
- [7] World Catalog Listing
- [8] Collected Writings
- [9] Library Thing Listing
- [10] Authors Den Listing
- [11] Theiapolis listing as actor
- [12] Cartoonist listing at Comiclopedia
- [13] CreativeHotList
Categories[edit]
- Academia
- Actors
- Theatre
- American academics
- American actor-politicians
- American environmentalists
- American essayists
- Comics characters
- Betting systems
- Research
- Film theorists
- American film actors
- American stand-up comedians
- American male singers
- Gambling
- Gambling games
- Gambling terminology
- American comedians
- American musicians
- American non-fiction writers
- American sports announcers
- College basketball announcers
- American writers
- Politics
- Political slogans
- Probability theory
- Jewish actors
- Jewish comedians
- Jewish writers
- Jewish environmentalists
- Jewish animal welfare advocates
- Jewish academics
- Jewish cartoonists
- Jewish politicians
- Jewish musicians
- Jewish gambling writers
- Jewish playwrights
- Jewish bandleaders
- Jewish astronomers
- Notable residents of Oak Park Illinois
- Notable residents of Illinois
- Gambling writers
- Acting
- Activism
- American astronomers
- American columnists
- American computer programmers
- American entertainers
- American jazz trumpeters
- American people of Jewish descent
- American people of Polish-Jewish descent
- American political writers
- American scientists
- American screenwriters
- American stage actors
- American voice actors
- Animal Welfare
- Astronomy
- Authors
- Blackjack
- Celebrities
- Celebrity Interviews
- Jewish American writers
- Jewish scientists
- Illinois Republicans
- Illinois politicians
- Scientists from Illinois
- Cornell University alumni
- Astrophysicists
- University of California Berkeley alumni
- Film production companies of the United States